There is no drinking game that beats a sip every time you hear this phrase- men are dogs! However, I will tell you what I think- I think women make dogs out of men. When you repeatedly call me a dog, I might start believing you and actually bark. If you treat me like one, I will say ‘to hell with this being a good man, I might as well be a dog.”

It is an art of the womenfolk-making dogs out of good men. Of course we agree that there is a good number of naturally made dogs. But there are ways women treat men that will make them better dogs than what we even believe them to be. Womenfolk hone this ‘dogness’.

Case scenario: He is a good guy. He treats her well. He never forgets her birthday. He is always on the phone checking up on her. But she doesn’t like it. He is too good. He is suffocating her. Good is too boring. She needs a man that brings a certain flare in the relationship. Someone who will make her cry, but have amazing make-up sex with her thereafter. She prefers someone who will repeatedly keep her on toes. The good guy is too dull and predictable. Too loving. However, if he tries to be the bad boy, he becomes a dog! Men are such dogs!

Case scenario: a man spots an object of desire in one of those groups of women that flock together like sheep. He walks up to her, offers to buy her a drink and maybe get a conversation going. This he does in the most civilised of ways. She will look at him. Size him up. From his shoes to his haircut. Then she will laugh, or sneer.

It doesn’t matter how many points he scores. She just wants to humiliate a brother. Frustrated and humiliated, he will walk back to his chair, look out for a willing female, then chipsfunga her. What a dog! That’s what they will say when they spot him leaving. Men can be such dogs!

Case scenario: you want to go for diner. He has no money. He has borrowed from all his friends in the past few months to please you. You still need more. This particular day, he asks politely if you can go Dutch. Such a dog! Can’t treat a woman well!

If you were to ask many men, or if they were brave enough to speak about it, they would tell you how much everything is always about the woman. There is nothing that hones a dog better than being ignored-always doing things for other people. It erodes the feeling of self-worth. He is there to pleasure the woman. To bark all night and keep vigil while the queen sleeps peacefully.

Men would tell you that Valentine’s Day is always for the woman. The wedding Day is always for the woman. His birthday can be forgotten but the woman’s cannot be. They would tell you that phone calls are made to the woman, and if she finds time in her busy schedule to call you, then you are a lucky one.

It is sickening, and shameful how many women will sit back and relax, enjoying the boat ride paddled tirelessly by the man. A man who is always a dog if he falls short.

As much as we want to believe that manliness is based on some sort of hardiness, he too has a heart you know? He has feelings as well. He likes to be surprised, not just with a new lingerie in the bedroom, but with new shoes as well. Something that is his and his alone

It is unfortunate that this selfishness embroidered deep within us does no good than to make men dogs. It is like him being with you is doing him and the rest of humanfolk a favour. She will sit down and watch you propel this relationship. Any action she will give is lipservice in form of commentaries on how you are doing this, this, this and that wrong! You are doing it all wrong! You are always doing it wrong! Such a dog!